Gary Woltal's Blog

As change continues in our real estate world, our national economy, politics, life in general, I have listened and heard from others all about their search for joy. That inner peace that we all seek, that contentment, that feeling that life is good despite the up and down experiences we all share each day. You can

   Find In Your Life Real Joy.

You have to drive yourself into that joy. Walk into that splashing and spraying water and let it soak you fully for you to have that huge inner smile. It is a choice to not let your life be driven by apathy and indifference. But rather by being a difference maker. YOU make it happen. With others you interact with you uplift, encourage, empower, teach, praise, and have a positive impact on them with your ACTIONS. Action is a key to your joy, because in some odd circular fashion, life has a way of giving back to you what you give out to others. What you do for others has a profound and lasting impact on them.

Then with that strange 'what comes around goes around' way the world works, it has a profound and lasting impact on WHO?

YOU!!!

Find real joy in your life by being a difference maker. Touch another's life. Be active not sedentary. Walk into the spraying water and FEEL the happiness that was meant for you. See life with child like wonder eyes.

"The fragrance lingers on the hand that gives the rose."  - Anonymous

I have thought long and hard sometimes what separates some who achieve big dreams whether in real estate or life and I have concluded

 IT ALL IS BETWEEN THE EARS.

They dream big.They execute on a plan. The dismiss fear in their lives. They go for it. Those great sailing ships were not meant to stay in the docks but rather to be tossed on the open seas with the salt spray in your face and the sails filled with the wind.

At some point in our life we need to learn to think big. We only go round once you know.

Have confidence in yourself. Have dedication to your dreams. Have fun. Do you think this Basset Hound is not having a good day? He is enjoying life to the max. Free yourself from limiting beliefs by not only positive affirmations looking in the mirror each day saying boy you're good looking, and wow you're good, but nail some sheepskins to the wall with things you have accomplished.

You'll feel better and you'll know the grandest and most wonderful universe in the world is found between those two ears. Even if they are a bit floppy. But loveable nonetheless.

As we cross the time of year when the clocks go back one hour and seemingly we have MORE time in at least one day, what did you do with your extra hour? If you've ever talked with the terminally ill they really view life as precious with months even down to weeks left to live.

Thinking of what we would do if given a little EXTRA time in our life can help us focus. What would you do if given an extra month of your life that you thought you cheated death about?

I found it ironic for this post as it was formulated in my mind. My short answer of what I would do was tell more of the people in my life that I loved them or do some other kindly act that perhaps that I was remiss in doing. Instead coinciding with Active Rain having an 18 hour server outage with the inability to post this article up on the site I spent time in frustration "waiting" for the system to return. Technology and systems frustrated me once again in my life and I never learn the lesson to stop fighting them. I think I have eternal hope with computers and other people sometimes. But I know I easily "frittered" away an hour of time "trusting" Active Rain. I should know better. So my lesson learned was give them ten minutes.Then on to better things, which I did do eventually.

So the question to all of you (outside Active Rain snafuing your life) what would you do with some extra time given to you if granted by a magic wand? Remember this is bonus time in your life that you don't deserve but you are given a second chance almost like that extra hour given on a Sunday when switching back to standard time.

In working with many people lately I find too many down in the dumps. Not that I don't have my challenging days like anyone else but I try to keep getting up off the mat and live to fight again another day. Here are some tips and tricks if you will to keep your spirit up and keep you

           Burning Your Fire Brighter.

Listen to lively, inspirational, upbeat music. Turn it up loud till you feel it in your bones.

Beat your brains out with exercise till you feel the runner's high.

Incorporate much light into your life. Sunshine, bright light indoors, bright colors in rooms.

Do something you really enjoy doing. Do it over and over again. Soak it in. Think about it.

People - surround yourself and make contact with the people you need in your life that allow soft landings for you, make you feel special, those that you enjoy touching on a regular basis or being with that make life worth living. You know who they are. Don't make this harder than it is.

Laugh constantly. Find the others that make YOU laugh. You make them laugh. Practice this till this becomes a natural way of living for you.

Dance - don't knock it till you try it. This has become a lost art form for many younger people and we need to all find this at some point in our life. It is such a fun way to connect with others and lift spirits.

Play. If there's one thing I will harp on throughout what I write, and that is to NEVER lose the ability to play in your life. All work and no play, well you know what we call Jack. Play with pets. Play with children. Play a sport by yourself, with a team, or against competition. Play a musical instrument. For God sake, please play. Play a video game and get creamed by an eight year old. Just the sheer act of playing will uplift your spirit.

Try any or all of these ideas or give me your best shot ones with your comments. But your spirit CAN be lifted with a little focus today. I am here to give you a booster shot to get you going again in the right direction.

NO FROWNS ALLOWED is my motto. I best be seeing your smiling, laughing, and happy self around these parts real soon. Anything else, and I am going to have to come over there and tickle you.

Within Active Rain there are so many groups with which to read from the "experts" on various topics. A new Group I was made aware of by Carole Provenzale, Long Island and NY Feng Shui consultant is the

ActiveRain Group: Feng Shui for RealEstate.

Feng Shui is the study of energy, light, space, and organization when it comes to interior and exterior design. As you learn more about this it is very fascinating. A cluttered or dark environment can grow in energy with a few changes.

Click on the Group link above if this is an area you would like to learn more about. It would help with home staging tips and also how to sell a home faster. With Carole as Moderator of this new Group it is bound to have some very lively blog posts from the professionals in this area.

I see it in the eyes of buyers as they reconfigure their life with a new location and a new home with its fresh amenities. Life is all about change. The reality for all of us not to forget with our own lives is that

THE PEN IS ALWAYS THERE.

Treat each day, each month, each year as a clean sheet of paper. This year you were a teacher, next year perhaps a Stager or Realtor. Our identity and our lives are being designed by ourselves. Granted you can paint yourself in quite a corner with family and financial responsibilities at times but with enough pages in your book, you can start to write NEW stories about you.

Think of the old line, the world is a stage. What roles are you playing? Father, Mother, victim, hero, lover, soap opera Queen, overcomer, star, pain in the butt to many, or how about underdog or difference maker? Think about this. Do you even want to change your life? Maybe you are content where you are. But remember change happens around you ready or not for your current storybook life. Maybe it is time for a change in your story.

Don't let other people write your life story. BIG MISTAKE. Remember, you only have so many pages and this book is about YOU!! Conflict and adversity are a part of any story. Yours too. Ultimately if your story is worth writing and reading (others watching you) you will overcome all sorts of problems. Pure drama. True courage. Defeat and despair will be replaced by hope and love.

Enjoy writing this story and defining and redefining your roles as you move through each chapter. Enjoy creating that picture of success as you see it and also what you envision as happiness. I look forward to picking up your book and savoring it. May it be a bestseller for you.

In working with clients in real estate or people in general you come in contact with you need to be aware of

The Two Sides to Elephant Memory.

Now elephants as creatures are well known for their long memory in nature. They remember where long lost watering holes are, they remember where they were born, they remember their baby elephants and their spouses.

In life having elephant memory is "good" if you are the one dishing out compliments, hugs, random acts of kindness, love, smiles, etc. EVERYONE will remember YOU.

However, provide emotional pain to someone, ignore them, hurt them, disrespect them, and your life will be miserable relative to another for a long time. This is "bad." 

Especially with women. Somehow, they just NEVER forget. Plus, they remind you about it all the time.

So be careful with everyone you interact with along the way. Those long term memory cells, that Elephant memory is soaking in what you are doing to them and how they "feel" about what you are doing and how you are behaving. This is why it is so important, best you can, to provide a positive and professional experience to everyone. Don't lose your cool. You are the one that people will remember with their long term memory as a joyful experience. Something they will want to experience over and over again. People will gravitate to you with your smiling elephant self. A secret to referrals. You may be a big lumbering being but are so sweet and gentle on the inside.

Now that you have this lesson down for today why do we all have cravings for some peanuts?

The more I see some frowny faces in my travels each day based on depressing economic news, the more I am convinced that people need to take on the attitude that they will

       LET NO ONE SPOIL YOUR HAPPY DAY.

So much of happiness is about perception. About perspective even. How about choice? You really do choose to be happy you know. Sure things happen to you. People hurt you. You get disappointed.

Imagine yourself metaphorically at least as a young child. What about that tree you were going to climb today? Why were you going to climb it? Because it was fun silly. And it brought you joy. You felt feelings of happiness within.

So what is wrong with you? The tree is still there. You are still a climber. Get out there and stop thinking about everything else that is wrong in the world and go climb that tree.

People forget that they do control MUCH in their life if they will just focus on the parts that they do control. That's where controlling your happiness is.

Find happiness. Choose a happy path. Much happiness is found in simple and free activities.

Have you walked your dog lately?

Have you played with your children?

Did you enjoy your hobby?

Isn't there that good book to read that you've meant to get to?

Have you kissed the one you love?

Never, ever....

let anyone spoil you having a happy day!

Whether we are Realtors, Stagers, Loan Officers, Inspectors, Title Company Escrow Officers or others working in the housing industry I sometimes think that the work is mainly a vehicle just to interact with people in life. You could be shining shoes and it would be the same thing.

Namely we are in many instances Putting People Back Together One Piece At A Time.

What I mean by that is that under the surface many people have broken lives of one sort or another. We may be this way ourselves. Pain, grief, divorce, stress, significant problems of health, finance or relationship. We all are human. But as we interact with our clients they become real. They are not ONLY there to find that house. True, we are not marriage counselors or financial advisors, but we are this - LISTENERS.

Every one has a story to tell, whether they be young and energetic or in the twilight of their years. There are always stories of pain if you hang around long enough. Life has its natural share of bumps and bruises.

By being a good listener, an interesting thing takes place. Healing. The broken pieces seem to come together better. What was the fractured becomes sewn back together. I have heard stories from buyers on the second trip looking at houses of three family members who drowned in a lake. And this from smiling faces in my vehicle. The pain was there. Talking about it completely helped.

If you are a Stager or Inspector and have these tangential conversations off business with clients, be patient with them and LISTEN. Respond with a few questions to probe a bit deeper and go back into a significant listener mode. Healing, trust me, takes place. Pieces go back together, one at a time.

It isn't that hard to be caring in the world. Some of it just takes slowing down, opening your eyes, keeping quiet and listening carefully with both ears. Look into another's eyes. Read in your mind what you see. Putting people back together is about love.

They will know with you that they have found a safe place to land.

            THEY WILL HAVE FOUND IN YOU A FRIEND

I find in the world, especially in today's tough real estate market, hard times financial market, and uncertain political times people just need a little "hope." It's all it really takes. I try to be Mr. Reminder man out there to them and tell them

    You Really Can Get Better Over Time.

Think of all the improvements you may want to make in your life. Maybe something as simple as cleaning your desk. How about starting that exercise program? Spending more time with family. You come up with one, two or three things you've put off that need attention. It really comes down to focus and putting your energy towards it. Life will ALWAYS have its ups and downs along the journey. You carry your umbrella with you to shield yourself from the new unexpected things that pelt you. But how do you get that mound of laundry off the top of the dryer? Focus and energy. You then inherently are BETTER for completing the task. Something else happens too. YOU feel better. So cut yourself some slack about not tackling all 100 projects in your mind and just work on a small handful.

You really can get better over time. The secret to it is YOU HAVE TO WANT TO and then go out and EXECUTE!!!