The modern day world is full of stress and strain. The expression stop the world I want to get off seems more and more appropriate each year. In the early years of the telephone it became an annoyance by telemarketers ringing it at the dinner hour. Now the curse of the cell phone is it can track you down anywhere with a call and with GPS technology even pin point your location. No wonder we all want to retreat to the deep woods and get unplugged now and then.
I want to talk about a consequence of this speeded up world that can hit us at any point in life. It is a heightened form of fear. Think of it as being overwhelmed.
I am talking about "PANIC."
We may have experienced it at various points in our life. You know when it sets in as the mind locks up and doesn't know what to do. I know I have experienced it when driving a car on ice and it slid out of control towards a concrete bridge guard rail. Also, one time a horse I owned was tied up incorrectly to a metal fence and was spooked and ran off with the fence section dragging behind it. I thought the world was about to end. Your heart beats faster and your mind goes blank.
For those who get clinical panic attacks it can take the form of uncontrollable rocking, back and forth.
You just want to scream, not knowing what to do.
Fortunately, there is light at the end of the tunnel. For ordinary panic the ride is a short one before it subsides. You need a place to retreat to in order to re-think what happened, and to process your feelings.
Metaphorically speaking, stressed out buyers and sellers of real estate come to a REALTOR as that calm place to stop panicking when all sorts of twists and turns occur during a transaction. They lose a bid on the house, the prospective buyer is low balling the seller and insulting him. The lender does not approve your loan. How could they? You're a good person. Lots of fun and games. Throughout it all the REALTOR is the calm intermediary between all parties. They are a CALM CORNER.
Physically and emotionally, you also need a calm corner in your life. This may be a quiet room in your home. It may be a retreat away from your normal world. It may be getting together with that one true friend in your life as a sounding board, family or otherwise. It may be immersing yourself in music or nature. Someplace where you can achieve calmness, peace and a sense of your spirituality. It will help you overcome any stress, fears and panic that the world hurls at you.
KNOW WHERE YOUR CALM CORNER IS.
Visit it often !!! Where's yours?
Hi Gary. Great post. I am always fighting off various stages of panic. I need to find a calm corner!
Ken
Ken: The search is on.
Maria: Rest is good too.
Team Harpers: I am similar to you. I do think strangely or not, I have multiple calm corners. One is out on the basketball court running back and forth on the court and getting all sweaty. There's just something about getting physical that lets you unwind.
Gary, come on!!! I asked you this before, but are/were you a therapist? What you write is so "inner child" stuff, that I can't help but wonder. ;-)
Fortunately, my calm place is on my knees....;-) But I am calm about 99% of the time. Very laid back, and I love my sanctuary - my home. Also when I'm dancing or playing golf! Wherever it is that I am with my hubby!
Wow Gary. You have hit a great topic. I will be the first to admit that I "secretly" panic. However, every so often when my panic shows - usually it's the office secretary or other agents in the office who are a bit taken back to see this side of me - in panic mode, But, I am the first to know when my panic is going to effect others and usually will acknowledge it - like the last time when I announced, "Ok, now I'm starting to freak out here, I've gotta a little too much on my plate today". - Sometimes people offer to help, and I appreciate that they care. Sometimes just reminding myself I am beginning to panic is enough to calm me down - like taking a deep breath and counting to 10. Often, hinting I am in panic mode sets the tone for those around me - in other words implying "now would not be a good time to ask me a question or seek my opinion". A friend once told me when he saw me in panic mode that I usually get to where I am going and nobody ever knows - Yes, I have a way of pulling myself together. My corner - is my car, with the music really loud and fun upbeat tunes to sing too (Cheryl Crow, Jimmy Buffet to name a few) - and it's a law in NY to not drive and talk on the cell phone so this is my time to unwind and my calming corner!
Marchel: What a great way to start the day. I am a reader of the Word at the end of the day, but I think your timing might be better. Getting lost in books is good too, as you can find a quiet room or be outside and immerse yourself in it.
Carol: I'm glad you know when you are in panic mode. Your heart really starts to race. I had this one time driving a car at high speed in a very narrow lane next to a high speed concrete wall and I thought I was getting tunnel vision, as my heart rate picked up. I'm happy you have your car to escape to with your tunes. Hopefully no one will pop by and knock on the window while you are calming down : ) Hey Carol, whatcha doing in there??
Hi again Gary,
I'm familiar w/ those panic attacks, while I've not experienced them myself I have been in the company of others who have. I cannot imagine how awful that is. I'm just glad I can be there for them in whatever capacity it may be to get them through it.
I have tons of quiet places, some are too silly to share while others such as painting, jewelry making, looking at the scenery & nature calm me. I can watch a frog hop around a good 15 minutes or so.
Thanks for posting!
My calm corner is in my bathtub. Not everyone can get to their physical "calm place" whenever panic or stress sets in. That's when it's helpful to be able to imagine being in the "calm space". It's a couple of deep breaths, eyes closed, visualizing a tranquil and safe location and it's instant relief.
Sandy
Carole: Warm to hot water is soothing for the soul.
Cynthia: Interesting corners for you. I must admit I have hunted toads for fun to put them in a box.
Charles: Napping is good. Active Rain is invigorating for sure.
Rosario: You have found a place of peace, I can tell with the deck.
Debra: Active Rain is therapy for us readers and writers and sharing with friends for sure.
Sandy: Tranquil and safe I think are the key like you said. Lots of bathtub locations here. Maybe that is why it is a focused on room in the house.
Barbara: Kind words, thanks. Glad some reading is a good calm spot for you at the end of the day. It is for me too.
William: Finding ourselves is a great way to put it. Kind of like making time to think.
Mara: Cool, a zen garden. Looking at that could provide some peace. Aromatherapy. Now another bathtub and candle visual I have in my mind. Maybe this is the REALTOR secret for unwinding I've discovered : )
I go to my son's high school baseball games 2-3 days a week and turn OFF my phone (sacrilege I know!). LOL This builds my relationship with him and I get some relaxation out of the deal as well!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NDhGqQNrm1w
Joey: Ah, another basketball enthusiast. Cool!
Cynthia: Other calm corners for me are meditation in a quiet room, watching sports on TV or in person, running, walks in nature especially by the water, visiting the ocean, a lunch with a true friend, any kind of vacation with my family or extended family, volunteering, horseback riding, mountain climbing / hiking, and time on the computer writing.
The horse turned out fine. After dragging the metal section of fence behind it around a field the horse got wedged between a car and another fence. We had to cut off the leather bridle with a knife. He was breathing so hard from fear that blood came out of his nostrils. True panic not only on my part but also the horse's.
Liz: The calm corners we find not only allow us to settle down from panic but rejuvenate us mind, body, and soul. Glad I could provide something for you to do during the quiet time at the Open House.
Arina: I love rollerblading and being out with the dog too. Reading of any kind allows you to immerse yourself in your imagination and get away. Just be aware of your calm corners as you find them and visit them often. Enjoy those sunny days.
There is a website www.stoppanicattacksforgood.com that offers all natural cure for panic attacks. I personally have never had one (amazing considering I sell real estate AND have five kids).
I understand it can be devasting. Good luck to those who experience this.